Parenting is the hardest job in the world and each stage of your child’s life brings a new set of challenges and rewards. Parents can often feel overwhelmed, under qualified, tired and stressed.
In general terms, young children have one main goal and that is to get their needs met, whereas parents tend to have a much broader set of worries and issues to deal with in life, it’s no wonder that sometimes there are battles for your time and attention.
It is really important to remember to stay aware of your own thoughts, feelings and reactions to situations. If you are feeling cross, take time to reflect on the source of the stress, is it your children’s behaviour or are there some other issues in the mix?
Also, try to make sure that you get your own needs met as an individual and not just a mother, whether it’s finding time for yourself or time with your partner. Once people learn to be more positive towards themselves and to be aware of what they need and how to achieve it, they are more likely to be in a better position to cope with the day to day difficulties.
Every child mis behaves from time to time and children need boundaries for their behaviour given to them in a firm and respectful way. However, of equal importance is the relationship and the attachment that you have with each of your children as individuals.
As parents, it’s essential that we find some time in our busy schedules to nurture the bonds we have with our kids. This can be harder than we think, with the one hundred and one other jobs that need to be done in a day, But whether it’s football in the park, reading a book with your youngster, chatting whilst driving in the car or playing games during bath time, these can all be opportunities to do some bonding, they can be times to listen, love and connect.
The old adage that kids grow up faster than you think can be hard to believe when you are in the midst of homework, dirty football boots and squabbles. So try to recall the good bits rather than always focussing on the trials and tribulations of the day. We often need to be generous to ourselves and our children and realize that there is no such thing as a perfect parent or a perfect child.
Being aware of your own stress levels and responses, make sure your own needs are met as a parent, and give of your time and love as freely as you can. It’s worth remembering to enjoy your kids in the here and now, as they will be onto the the next stage of their development before you know it!
